A modest life
by greatlight
Summary: So basically its about how Lily and James chose to be Aurors and get so deeply envolved in the fight against voldemort, told from Lily's perspective like she was journalling it.


Well, yeah, so this is weird, I hate diaries, journals, whatever. First off there're time-consuming and you always hear these stories about people who put their heart and soul into their little diary and someone finds it and reads it and sooner or later everyone in the vicinity knows their deep dark secret that they love the blond haired blue eyed boy from down the lane and that they, until three months ago, were a bed wetter. Sounds like it will just cause me to worry about whom could find my diary will cause me unneeded stress, leading to a potential hernia or high blood pressure. I have enough stress, and that's the reason apparently I need this damn book. My high stress levels are causing me not to be able to focus. And according to McGonagall I need to get focus quick because I have few precious moments to figure out how I will spend the rest of my life. Yeah, McGonagall, she really knows who to calm people down.

So anyways, I'm doing it, make no sense to me, but ill do it. I could use some direction and that's what McGonagall says I will gain. After writing in this for a month read threw it and see if I can find patterns about what I like. And my likes will lead me to a career. Walla!

So let's start out simple a list of my likes and dislikes.

Like: Dislikes:

food (!) liquorish

reading Prefect duty (ROUNDS)

friends & family (awe!)foul smelling things

Wow, this was hard. I was going to put in ice cream and then I found this horribly sad. My list of favorite things can't include food at least more then once. And my dislikes list, can you say pathetic? I mean who likes foul smelling things (people with weird fetishes)? I could have said racism or poverty, but no, my great and noble dislike is of liquorish. (Don't get me wrong its not that I like racism or poverty, my point is that it didn't come directly to mind. This proves I'm directionless). I need a goal, a higher purpose... That's my mission for today find a higher purpose. Its perfect timing too, because I need to leave before I am late for transfiguration.

I have new Dislikes: James Potter, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, and Peter (don't know his last name, for now its git)! Oh let me tell you they are high on that list. But I will start from the beginning because it was pretty eventful day. Oh and I found a goal which makes me feel like an ass for having overlooked.

So I had to run to make it into transfiguration in time. And even though I put my all into it I was late. Don't ever be late to a McGonagall class it's a horrible thing to slide into the room trying to stop and became face to face with the dreaded professor.

"Lily what year are you in?"

"Seventh Ma'am"

"Did you get lost?"

"No," Then she just stared at me. I can't handle being stared at make me nervous. And being nervous makes me blush. Then I become aware of blushing which makes me blush for like ten minutes, it's a lot of fun.

Anyways she's starring at me along with the entire class; I'm doing my best to avoid her stare as well as the classes.

"Well," she said in a short tone.

"Well, why was I late?" I was fishing for more time to think of an excuse, yeah I'm an idiot, I know.

"Miss Evans," she snapped.

"Sorry, a first year was lost and as is my duty as a prefect I helped her out." We just got back to school yesterday which meant that that excuse would be relevant for about three more weeks.

"Predictable Evans, take a seat." Okay maybe I overshot how effective that excuse would be. I looked around for a seat and it was full up all except next to Peter Git. On the first day of classes it's not wise to be late you always get the shitty seats. And this was a shitty seat, not only was I sitting next to Peter Git but right next to us was James and Sirius, the seat was empty which meant it was supposed to be saved for Remus who obviously must have been sick again. Anyways my seat meant not only was I partners with Mr. Git but that I will be hassled by the leaders of the Marauders. (Marauders incase for some joyous reason when I am older I forget there sad existence they are the four toughest, popular, powerful, cleverest, most up-to-know-good, and most loved-by-all-girls-everywhere guys in my year or simply in the whole school. And since they figure they had all this in common they needed to label it and them, keep in mind they're clever, thought of the Marauders. There is James Potter, who is exceptionally good at quidditch, the smartest in our year (next to me that is, Ha! The come in second wanker), handsome with an outstanding body and messy black hair, and from what I hear is very rich. Then there is Sirius whom I hear is smart but he has yet to prove it, extremely handsome, never serious, never up to anything good so he's on my shitlist when I am forced to do Prefect rounds, and without a doubt rich as he spends it freely. Remus is my partner on patrol, he's the nicest, and in my opinion the smartest of all of them, he, like all the others, is good looking, and he has some illness because he is always absent. Peter is a git, in my opinion its enough said, he picks fights he never has to fight cause the other Marauders defend him, and therefore has become a crude horny (um… yeah) Git!.

So anyways I sit down McGonagall starts drowning on when Peter whispers "that was a nice excuse, I thought you were supposed to be clever."

He called me dumb. I have a short temper but the downfall is my temper kind of makes me unable to think straight, I think that's the people who hit first have my temper. But I calmed myself down.

"Peter," I whispered. "Do you remember one of your excuses last year for being late?"

"Enlighten him," whispered James.

I glared at James for a second before I continued. "I'm talking of course when you told McGonagall that you were helping out Flitwick, whom of course was standing about 3 feet away from her at the time. You really can't call me stupid can you, when you don't have the brains to look around a room."

"Awe Lils, I am touched you have taken to remember every instance of my life." He said.

"Shut up Peter," said James.

"You little-"I started but never finished. Should have realized James was warning Peter to shut up because McGonagall was watching us.

"Ms. Evans care to demonstrate." Holy Crap! Demonstrate what? Shit. Shit.

"Water into ice, Evans" said James, exactly like an asshole would say it.

Now here is where I'm worth my salt because I have read the chapter about how to turn water into ice a while ago. I knew it so when I walked up to there and McGonagall said. "Alright say _Melticious_ and make sure to note the clockwise wrist flick" I was thrown off I thought it was _Congelo_. Duh Potter lied, told you I was an idiot.

So I pointed my wand at the cup of ice and said "_Melticious_" and the water melted perfectly. So I was relieved, then I heard an audible grown from McGonagall.

"Potter come up here and show Evans her mistake."

McGonagall sure knows how to kick you when you're down and for that mater rub salt in your wounds.

Potter came up looking all smug, I wanted to hit him, but instead smiled sweetly waiting for the shame to come.

"First Evans, she told you to make smoke from a solid substance which counts as changing of the form twice."

His talking to me like I was three years old.

"Which means," he continued, "and I think Professor McGonagall tried to tell you this that the left flick of the wrist was important because it's not normally done when you move your arm right." Then he successfully made ice into gas. McGonagall praise him by saying she would give him five points for the answer but since I was going to detract five for Lily's answer I'll just null and void the whole thing. Then she told us to take a seat and practice with our partners.

Peter turned his attention to James and Sirius, who I just realized was sleeping; I wonder why McGonagall doesn't pick on him.

"Hi Lily," he said with half closed eyelids, "You on patrol tonight."

I eyed him wearily, "Yeah…"

"Even though Remus is out, does that mean you have to do it alone?"

"Don't know, never came up before."

"Uhuh"

"Why?"

"No reason Evans."

"So Evans," said James as he casually made smoke out of every near object after he vaporized his cup of ice.

"Yes Potter" I said as I smoked my ice.

"You find yourself a boyfriend yet?"

"And what if I say yes?" already flustered. I don't easily talk about personal things with my best friend and he was practically a stranger.

"I'd call you a liar."

"Ouch." I mumbled trying not to really continue any conversation with him or any of the Marauders for that matter.

"Evans."

"Yes, Potter" I said exasperated.

"I didn't mean to offend you but I am just stating facts, for all these years at Hogwarts I don't remember you ever having a boyfriend."

"Wow James I'm going to take a leaf out of Peter's book and say thank you for taking an unnervingly close interest in my life."

"Evans you're avoiding."

"Well I apologize for ignoring your questions that can only be meant to offend me," my temper getting the better of me.

Then he grinned, his stupid trademark grin, like he won. Won what? I don't know but he made it seem like he backed me into a corner.

"You have a girlfriend Potter?" Not that I wanted to continue this conversation but I'm not one to back down or be backed into a corner and stay there. He shrugged and I took that for a yes.

"Yeah well Potter, don't criticize me on my relationship status when you can't even admit to yours. Are you getting ashamed yet that you can have a different girl for each day of the week?"

That of course made the two of them grin at James.

"I'm taking it that no you don't care that if you have a different girl every day that it means that every day you make yesterday's girl feel like shit. Good for you James you're such a charmer."

Okay I'll admit I was getting a little carried away. He was looking at me but I couldn't tell what he was thinking. Sirius was smirking at me. And Peter had wandered off and was hitting on some girl from Hufflepuff. Then, very fortunately, the bell rang.

I gathered my stuff up as quickly as I could and then left.

"Does that bother you?"

"What Potter."

"That I have lots of girls."

"Nope, do not care."

Then I saw her, my salvation, Aine. She was the polite way to get the hell away from James. But I think he saw her before I did because I saw him nod to Sirius and then Sirius put his arm around her shoulders and started leading her ahead of us. She threw me back a terrified look one that asked for an explanation. I mouthed; I have no freaking clue and nodded my head to indicate Potter.

I walked into history of magic, he followed, but what really threw me off is that he sat right next to me and I notice that Sirius had sat next to Aine in the seat ahead.

"Potter, what are you doing?"

"Evans, I just changed my seat."

"Potter last time you sat next to me my hair was died pitch black."

He laughed, "You looked so funny."

"Amazing."

"Don't worry I'm just sitting."

"Ha! Well, I doubt that." Then I heard a tiny little ding. I looked to Aine and she was hunched over trying to shield a piece of paper away from Sirius. I grabbed a piece of parchment out of my bag careful to keep it away from James who looked at me with his stupid grin. He did look a little curious though.

"Lily I'm scared."

I wrote back. "I'm right there with you."

"He's been asking all these inane and insane questions, like if I had a choice would I live in Antarctica or the Arctic. He made me answer so I said, 'There's one with penguins. I want that one that way if I am going to freeze to death I might as well get to see a penguin as my parting vision. How are you faring?"

I chanced a look at James who was reading over my shoulder.

"Ahem." I said glaring at him.

He smiled at me and then looked away.

"Right now, he's doing a lot of staring, trying to get in my head and make me crack I suppose. Well let him try Aine I'm unbreakable."

"I think James would be interested in the challenge." I only had to remain confused by her sudden shift in handwriting for a split second because after that I heard Aine say she would curse him till he was shriveled and useless as a man if he didn't give it back. A person could yell in history of magic and the teacher wouldn't have noticed. Not that most people did the atmosphere in the room made it so people would just rather sleep.

Sirius looked back at James rather fearfully when he gave the note back to Aine who was still threatening her with his wand.

"What's her name?" asked James.

"Aine, why?"

"I like her, she's scaring the shit out of Sirius that's not easily done." He said sort of laughing. Because Sirius was very elaborately trying to calm Aine down whom was not having it, and looked like with any sudden movement she was going to make him a goner.

"Yeah well…" I drifted off not sure how to respond.

"Is she your best friend?"

"Yes."

Aine finally sat back down but anytime she made a sudden movement Sirius very elaborately hid under his desk.

Well that is really the interesting thing that happened in classes. After History of Magic Aine and I made sure we couldn't be separated by the Marauders. So the Marauders took their usually seats together and blew things up, everything was back to normal. Aine did hear Sirius say her name once, so she yelled, "What's that?" reaching for her wand.

He held up his hands defensively, "Nothing Aine dearest, just telling James here that our potion must be wrong because it doesn't look like yours." Then he grinned as he watched her wearily for her response. James and Peter burst out laughing. Aine smiled. She whispered to me, "see all you have to do is threaten them Lily, and then look. But you have to make sure that he really thinks you will hurt him."

"Which of course you would."

"Oh no doubt."

So time passed and sooner then I knew I had to go on the first of my dreaded rounds as a prefect.

Right as I was heading down to the common room Aine ran up, "I'm sorry Lily as soon as heard about it I ran to sign up, see I haven't been back here all day. He already signed up and I tried to very stealthily erase his name and add mine, but Sirius caught me and charmed an unerasable spell on the paper. Which I could easily break but if I did he said he would jinx me and there was an evil little glint in his eye that made me think he would do it."

"What are you talking about?"

"You don't know, cause Remus is gone they had a sign up for someone to work the prefect duties today. James signed up."

I just stared at her.

"Sorry dear but you're going to be late. You think he's trying to kill you?"

"Probably, but ill be ready, at least I hope I will be," I said as I walked down the stairs with the feeling of walking to the gallows.

"Evans you're late." First thing I heard when I walked down the stairs.

"Well I'm here now lets go," The only people in the room were the three Marauders. James jumped over the back of the couch and led the way out.

"Alright normally we go to the dungeon and work our way up." I said.

"The dungeon?"

"Yep, why the… oh you have lots of enemies down there don't you?"

"So do you. You're a Gryffindor too."

"True but I don't curse them on sight so if they had a choice to off either me or you, my money is on that you'd be a goner."

"Nice, but I'd guarantee that more then half of them are future death-eaters."

"Yeah I'm sure they probably will be especially when you know they're already labeled as such. I think it's called a self-fulfilling prophecy."

"Do you always do that?"

"Be more specific."

"Think the best of people."

"Why you ask?"

"Because I'm kind of banking on it," he mumbled.

"What?-"

"Evans your rounds started up already, we missed you."

We were already in the dungeon and I swear Slytherin has that place wired for non-Slytherins. Lucious, Snape, and Carlos are the basically the Marauders for Slytherine, except minus all the traits I gave them and substitute rich and come from good families (except Snape I think he might be an orphan). Anyways, they kind of have a hate for me and my non-pure blood. So typically I have to put up with their shit especially on rounds.

James was going to say something but I cut him off.

"You're out past curfew, that's 45 points off for Slytherin, 15 for each of you, now return to your dorm." I said this all with my hand on my wand. This situation was guaranteed to end in a fight, anytime a Marauder gets near a Slytherin there's a fight.

"Why are you there with James? James I thought you were low but to make out with a Mudblood, you're sadder then I thought."

"I said get back to your dorm!" I said cutting off James from speaking. I felt if James didn't say anything I could stop the fight, but on the other hand they just insulted me and I kinda wanted to see them hurt. And if I let James at it he would hurt them.

"And we don't take orders from Mudbloods."

Again I cut off James, "You're mistaken I'm not asking as a mudblood, I'm asking as a Prefect who has the authority to hex you to within an inch of your life if you do not get back in your dorm!"

"You don't have the authority Evans," Said Snape.

"Okay, then I'll be taking a liberty."

Carlos raised his wand at me, "Evans who are you kidding?"

"Who am I kidding," Okay here, I lost my temper. "Carlos, you're one of the saddest excuses for a wizard in our grade and you're trying to intimidate me?"

As I look back at this I feel a little guilty because as a prefect I am not allowed to pick fights and I might have in this situation. See that's what is good about Remus, he usually calms the situations down.

"Evans!" sad James, Pulling on my arm, I think I was moving to attack, but when I am angry I do things without realizing it –a very scary thought I know. But James intervention made me realize I have three wands pointed directly at me.

"Wow," I glanced back a worried look at James who was somehow still smiling smugly. Ok so apparently I was on my own. "Sorry got a little carried away, very unjust of me. So let's move past the fighting and realize that being out past curfew is very dangerous. So go back into your common room."

Lucious stepped forward towards me and I backed up, then I did something stupid. See I wasn't afraid to fight Lucious. But I suddenly became aware that if I fight him that might make me lose my prefect position. And so because I was worried I kind of reached out and grabbed for James arm, which officially gave him permission to intervene. Didn't matter though, he didn't, the wanker.

Being that I was concerned about me I didn't notice that Carlos and Snape were starting shit with James, all I knew was that his arm pulled away from me, which left me seemingly alone with Lucious.

"Evans, what are you doing? You have no power over us so get out of our dungeon." He was very close to me, but he did the one think he really shouldn't have done. He challenged me. And there is nothing I won't do to win a challenge.

I pulled out my wand and pointed it at his face. I smiled a little when I saw that it scared him.

"Snape correct me if I'm wrong, but prefects are allowed to use certain magics if they are threatened?" I didn't wait for his answer. "And Lucious I'm going to consider what you said a threat. _Somnus_!" and then he fell backwards to the ground. I then moved on to Carlos and said the spell to remove him of his wand, _expelliamus_, vaguely aware that James also disarmed Snape.

"Alright now that that is settled," I tapped my badge with my wand three times and it glowed green. A couple of seconds later the Slytherin prefects came. "Evans what did you do!" they said angrily as they looked at Lucious sprawled out by my feet.

"Look they were being resistant-"Both Snape and Carlos started to yell.

"Lucious is just sleeping Snape and Carlos were disarmed that's it, all I did was take off 45 points for them being out past curfew and that obviously can't be contested. I called you to escort them back to their dorms, because they have an obvious problem with me doing it," I said yelling over them

"All you did was take off 45 points?" The prefect said sounding confused.

"Yep, now if we can end this we really need to get back to our rounds.

I walked past them, I know I was being rude to my fellow prefects but I was pissed I was just called a Mudblood twice and threatened. I didn't even look back to see if James followed. But he did, I heard his footsteps slightly behind me as I turned into a deserted hallway. "Stupid creepy dungeons no wonder Slytherins are arses," I mumbled.

"Excuse me?" said James laughing. I glared at him. "That's the first time I've ever heard you insult someone unjustly."

"Yeah, well sorry I'm a little angry." I said lamely

"Well they did call you horrible things; I was waiting for you to curse them."

"Is that what you were doing? I thought you left me to rot."

"Oh get off it, you clearly wanted me to keep out-"

"Only cause if you would have talked you would have provoked a fight."

He grinned, "Probably but isn't that what you did."

"There was no fight."

"Um… you cursed Malfoy, I was there I am a witness."

"I think a fight means they needed to have struck back, they didn't therefore no fight, just me kicking their asses all by my lonesome."

"Bullshit. I stopped both Carlos and Snape from cursing you into oblivion as soon as you pulled your wand on Malfoy. You didn't notice?"

"No, but it's possible I go sort of tunnel-visiony in a fight…" Then I realized what I said, I gave my enemy an in. I'm screwed.

"You should work on that Evans; it's a potentially dangerous habit."

"Thanks for the concern. I'll be fine." I think the ass rolled his eyes at me.

No one talked for awhile and in fact the round was almost over when James suddenly stopped. "Evans I need to ask a favor."

"No."

"Evans!"

I glared at him. I was waiting for this all night, cue the prank's intro.

"Evans this is important."

"Don't care. Screw you and your pranks Potter." A little proud that his angry scowl and pouty lip had no effect on me.

"Will you at least listen?"

"I'm not walking away am I," I snapped, and okay apparently the poutiness did work on me, but only a little.

"I'm telling you this while having complete faith that you are actually a good person."

"Get to the point, before I get bored and wander off."

"Alright we need your help covering for Remus. With You-Know-Who picking up his pace people have become well really bloodthirsty and if they find out about Remus well he won't be allowed to stay at Hogwarts at the very least." Wow, I didn't know James did nervous, but he was, his words were rushed and he was ruffling up his hair.

"What about Remus."

He stared at me for a long while making me force his hand. Which I did I smiled grandly and then swung my leg like I was going to walk away.

He grabbed my arm and swung me back. "Okay, Evans." Then he leaned in and whispered in my ear. "He's a werewolf."

"Holy shit!"

"Evans." He said a little panicky.

"That's absolutely horrible, how can he?"

"Evans calm down."

"When?"

"He was younger, it happened during the summer of third year."

"Poor Remus, I heard it was unbelievable painful when you transform. Is it?"

"He's never said but from the look of it yeah."

"Hold up you moron you were there when he transformed, I know he's your friend and he's a good person and what not but when he's a werewolf, at least for that time, he doesn't exist."

"Evans I don't need a lecture, I know."

'Shut up! This is big okay if I want to drabble useless information to calm myself down, I can! Where does he go?"

"To transform?" I think he got from the look by my face that I meant to transform, "the shrieking shack."

"Wow, I thought the rumor that you guys were clever was just that, I stand in awe."

"Is that awe good or bad for me?"

I ignored the question, "Does Dumbledoor know?"

"Of course."

"Good, what do you need from me?"

"Well the help of a prefect in general would be good."

"You have Remus, what can I do?"

"Well," he said, "when Remus is gone, you can't draw attention to it, draw attention away from it if you could. Like don't complain about."

"Confused again."

"Are you always?"

"You could have threatened me. You could have done all sorts of things so I didn't ask questions about Remus. But no, you tell me he's a werewolf. You're going on a lot of faith. I could have a phobia of them and go into a panic that involves shouting…"

"This seemed easier. Plus I knew you wouldn't say anything."

"Why? I owe you nothing. In fact" an idea occurred to me," I could use this to get back at you for all the cruel things you did to me."

"First off you're not that petty and secondly, you know what would happen to Remus if you did and you are not that mean."

"I could be," already defeated. I was going to help.

"Fine" I said angrily, "On some conditions, there is no way I will be party if for some reason he gets out and hurts someone, I can't cover that up…"

"Yes and…?"

"Alright there was really only that one condition, but it's important."

"Consider it a deal then Evans."

"I don't understand this at all."

"Yeah, well I found out today that you're not as smart as you think you are, so it fits."

"Come again Potter and keep in mind I know a big secret."

He shot me a dirty look, apparently joking about that is off limits, "You said that the Slytherins would attack me over you and they didn't."

"Yeah well it's just those Slytherins, well Lucious actually. I know Snape would jinx you given even half a chance."

"What's his problem with you?"

"Muggle parents?"

"Your being dumb again, he's not like that to other muggle-borns. I've even heard he had his way with more then a few."

"Gross. Maybe it's because I curse him often."

"It took you awhile to curse him today."

"I had a prefect badge on therefore an obligation to be professional and plus you were there."

"What's that mean?"

"Last time you got into a fight with Snape you sent him to the Madam Pomfrey's. If I threw a spell you would have and you would have gotten in trouble plus hurt Snape and even though I hate him, he doesn't deserve weekly hospital wing trips."

"I beg to differ."

"You would."

"We should go back Evans it's really late in fact the sun is raising."

"Good should make getting up for classes go amazingly easy. Can I tell Aine?"

"What. No"

"She wont tell a soul, and plus she's weird, she'll distract people away from the truth by any means necessary, if she thinks it's a good cause."

"I'd prefer not right now, I barely trust you. This is pretty big secret and I only found out her name today."

When we got back into the room the Marauders were there looking like they've all been in a fight.

"You guys look like shit." I said tiredness makes me blunt.

"I knew I liked you for a reason Lilykins always stroking my ego," said Sirius.

"Yeah well I'd prefer if you don't use a form of my name and stroking in the same sentence. It kind of unnerves me."

"Well I'm sad to say that can't be done, whenever I think about stroking, your name comes to mind."

"Lay off it Sirius," said James.

"Is she in?" said Sirius.

"Yes she's in."

"Okay then I'm going to go get ready for class."

With that all the Marauders left. Remus completely avoided looking at me as he walked by me on the way, assuming by the state of him, to the hospital wing.

And so I had an hour to scribble this down before I began another day of class. That means I will be awake for 24 hours.

Oh and about my goal. Real quick, Muggle-born rights! Hell yeah! I need to represent. Did I mention I'm really tired?


End file.
